No One Is Going To Read This Post: Dealing with your toxic voice

///”No one is going to read this post.”\\\

The above statement was a warning from my inner toxic voice.

///”Your opinion has no value. Just look at yourself! You’re not the type of person other people reserve a moment of their time to pay attention to or follow. In fact, you’ll never be that type of person.”\\\

My toxic voice (TV) wasn’t entirely wrong. TV’s will always intertwine the tiniest of truths in their warnings to make themselves appear to be trustworthy and logical voices of reason.

Case in point: I can count the number of social media followers I have on one hand. Of those five close friends who gave me a pity follow, most no longer use social media. Therefore, my TV was simply pointing me in the general direction of an unpleasant reality. It’s a very real possibility I could spend huge chunks of time writing articles no one in this universe will ever find.

If this is the case, would it be worth it to write blog posts? I’d have to be insane to bet my hopes and dreams on odds like never or no one, right?

Is it worth it if no one is going to read it?

My inner toxic voice chimes in.

///”No. If you waste time writing blog posts no one reads, you’re insane. That’s why I’m here – to keep you grounded and logical. Some people just have dreams that were never meant to come true. It’s a fact and reality of life. Keep your heart and soul protected by remaining safe and simple.”\\\

Again, my TV wasn’t entirely wrong. When you don’t take chances, your heart and soul are protected from the agonizing pain of failure and rejection. But as I get older, I’ve also learned that when you don’t take chances, your heart and soul suffer from a lack of nourishment only a beyond-the-comfort-zone life can provide.

This had me wondering: was my inner TV speaking primarily on behalf of reality or fear?  

Extreme words and exaggerations

A common problem with inner toxic voices is their tendency to use extreme words or exaggerations, making their wisdom and warnings not quite as truthful as they originally seem.

For example:

Will NO ONE read this blog post? How true is this statement? It could be true, but it’s also potentially untrue. Will someone read this post or will no one read this post? Maybe a few will read it? Possibly tons of people? Maybe a handful will find it? Many? Several? A dozen? A city? There’s no way to predict what the final answer will be. Therefore, I have a choice:
1) Believe no one will read this blog post.
2) Believe someone will read this blog post.

Will I NEVER be the type of person others pay attention to or follow? Again, how reliable is this statement? Never the type? Sort of the type? The type a few will connect with? Or maybe I’m the type a generation connects with? How could I possibly know what type of person I am if I don’t put myself out there and step beyond the walls of my comfort zone? Therefore, I have a choice:
1) Believe no one will pay attention to my thoughts.
2) Believe someone will pay attention to my thoughts.

Do some people have dreams that are NEVER meant to come true? You get the idea. Sentences with extreme words are just imposters posing as voices of reason. Therefore, I have a choice. I can choose the lane I want to drive my thoughts down since both future outcomes are absolutely correct in this moment:
1) Believe my dreams will never come true.
2) Believe my dreams will come true – in some form or another.

Thought Blockers

Always, never, no one, and everyone are examples of extreme thought blockers. Because they exaggerate to the point of impossible truths and realities, thought blockers give our brains a “get out of thinking card.” Instead of formulating goals or strategies that could push us beyond the boundaries of our comfort zones into a land of new opportunities, thought blockers allow us to crawl back into the beds of our minds and blindly pull the covers over our logical reasoning.

The reason toxic voices specialize in thought blockers is because it’s much easier for TVs to control and “protect” us if we refuse to get out of the beds we’ve created for ourselves in our heads. However, if we can identify and remove thought blockers from our thinking, we can encourage ourselves to walk to the edge of our fears and contemplate the idea of in some form or another for our hopes and dreams. After all, our biggest dreams and goals exist in a space beyond the edges of our fears.

In some form or another – your potential and choices are endless. Since it’s impossible to know what the future holds, you must choose how you are going to bet on yourself.

Betting on yourself

I’ll say that again, you CHOOSE how you’re going to bet on you. In some form or another, what you receive in life will be a reflection of the bet you placed on yourself yesterday.  So don’t gamble mindlessly. Do your research. Be intentional. Have hope. Embrace serendipity.

///”No one is going to read this post.”\\\

Someone is going to read this post.

Hardly anyone will read this post.

Several people will read this post.

This post will be lost forever in the darkest corners of the internet.

This post will go viral and become a prime example of serendipity.

Success will never touch this post.

Success will find this post within five years.

This post will define me as a writer.

This post will open a tiny window down a career path I never even considered before.

So which of the above statements am I going to place my bet on? Before I decide, I must first do a little research.

No one is going to read this post: What the research says

According to several sources on the internet, bloggers/writers often don’t see a steady increase in traffic on their website until they have written roughly 50 blog posts. Granted, there are many factors that influence this number, such as:

• Quality and length of the posts.
• The number of online sources currently writing about the same topic.
• The frequency in which new posts are uploaded.
• Author’s interaction with the readers.
• Advertising spent to promote blog.
• Social media presence.
• Etc.

All that being said, if I’m placing a bet on myself, I’m going to consider statistical averages. Sure, I may do all the right things and still not attract a single reader after 75 posts have been written. Or it’s possible I could write 3 blog posts and go viral for no real reason other than the luck of being in the right place at the right time. Anything could happen, but I want to set myself up to be as successful as possible when I’m gambling on the outcome of my future.

When toxic voices get agitated and hostile

///”You’re drifting off topic. This is far too confusing. Everyone who started reading this blog post has already stopped reading it.  Are you talking about toxic voices? Are you talking about how to start a new blog? I don’t get it. Just scrap this attempt and start over. Or better yet, don’t even write a blog. The last thing you need right now is more disappointment in your life.”\\\

My TV is obviously concerned for its survival. It’s agitated. It’s trying to fill me with fear to prevent me from discovering what’s beyond the borders of my comfort zone. That means I must be on to something. Granted, as always, my TV brings up a bit of truth. I know my writing has areas where improvements can be made. I’m equally aware my writing and blog could use some adjustments to improve the reader’s experience. However, I also know perfectionism is one of my TV’s top strategies to throw me off course, paralyzing progress and preventing me from reaching my goals. Therefore, I need to accept this post may not be perfect, but worth finishing anyway. After all: Imperfection can potentially be a special kind of relatable magic.

My choices:

1) This blog post is imperfect and confusing for readers. Discard it immediately.
2) This blog post is imperfectly perfect. Maybe the following equation is the key to future success:

Magical imperfection + research + a set of reachable goals = personal success

Since I finished writing the post you’re currently reading and uploaded it to the internet, I think you can guess which of the two possible outcomes I chose to direct my focus towards.

No one is going to read this… and it wouldn’t be the first time

This isn’t the first blog or website with written content I’ve attempted to create over the years. In fact, the timeline of my life probably has at least 50 failed projects scattered randomly throughout it. Yet, not once over the last 2 decades have I ever thought of researching to learn more about the number of articles a website typically needs before it starts seeing a noticeable uptick in readers and traffic. Instead, I’d foolishly surrender my hopes to failure when my 5 to 10 articles couldn’t find any sort of traction.

The above realization is the type of stuff that happens when thought blockers get called out on their bluffs. When thought blockers are removed, you realize it’s not that you’re a bad gambler, you’ve just been making terrible bets on your future. In my case, I can now see I’ve been the type of gambler that places a bet, then walks away before the final outcome is revealed. I’m gone before the cards are turned over. I throw in the towel before my racehorse crosses the finish line. I’ve accepted failure before the ball on the roulette wheel has settled securely into one of those groove thingies.

Let your TV speak freely, consider its advice, make adjustments if needed, then continue on with your journey. As mentioned before, your toxic voice may offer a smidge of truth that could be of value to your plan moving forward. However, those tiny bits of truth your TV shares will often be served to you on a silver platter you probably can’t fully trust. Keep that in mind before choosing your reality.

Don’t gamble mindlessly. Do your research. Be intentional. Have hope. Embrace serendipity.

After having scanned my mind for thought blockers and other overly exaggerated statements, I have a better idea of the type of bet I’m going to place on myself in the coming year. There’s no way to predict how the end result will turn out, but I feel confident I’ll discover success in some form or another.

Since it takes roughly 50 blog posts on a website before readers start to take notice, my goal is to write one blog post a week for an entire year. That should give my website enough content to hopefully find its wings this time next year.

My plan

I already know my TV is going to be hyper focused on things like page views and post likes throughout the coming months. It will try to convince me my success is measured by the number of followers I have on social media. Or it will try to convince me the value of my writing is directly proportionate to the amount of money I receive for it. Although some of these concerns from my toxic voice may hold an ounce of truth, they won’t be something I evaluate until after I’ve put in a year’s worth of effort. Because: Research trumps toxic thoughts.

My inner toxic voice will also try to break me by making me feel as though I’m an imposter (Imposter Syndrome) and have no business writing about the things I’m writing about. Although there may be a smidge of truth in my TV’s warnings, I know there’s plenty of space in this universe for humans to share their lived experiences. Because: Intention trumps toxic thoughts.

Hope will become a huge target for my TV. It will try to convince me it’s dismantling my hope to protect me from disappointment and rejection. While there’s a chance my TV could protect me from a moment of disappointment, my eyes will be fixed on a spot beyond my comfort zone. Because: Hope trumps toxic thoughts.

My TV will do everything in its power to distract me from having foolish hopes in serendipity (when good things happen unexpectedly). Despite there being legitimate reasons for my TV to be concerned, serendipity is something I choose to have faith in. After all, unexpected good could happen to me. Unexpected good may not happen to me. Both are possible. Therefore, I’ll place a bet on the possibility of unexpected goodness. Because: Serendipity trumps toxic thoughts.

The way I see it…

Things are going to work out in some form or another.

1. My blog may turn out to be a success a year from now. Or…
2. In a year I may not be a successful blogger, but I will likely have enough written content to self-publish a book, which is also a dream of mine. Or…
3. I may not be a successful author in any form after year, but I will know myself better and be able to manage things like toxic voices more productively due to the time I spent thinking and writing about the subject.

In some form or another it’s all going to work out. I can feel it.

Cross your fingers!