Phase 1: The Unknown

Life often presents us with the unexpected, the unfamiliar, and the downright frightening. Whether it’s losing a job, saying goodbye to a loved one, or learning of a health scare, the unknown can trigger intense feelings of fear and anxiety. Let’s explore effective strategies for handling those initial moments after encountering uncertainty.

*Note: The following are suggestions for getting through the first hours, days and possibly weeks after an unexpected unknown.

1. Breathe and Stay Present:

When faced with the unknown, our minds often race with “what if” scenarios. Take a deep breath and focus on the present moment. Mindfulness techniques, such as meditation, can help you stay grounded and reduce anxiety (among other benefits).

In addition, it also helps to check in with yourself throughout the day (like when you stop at a traffic light or notice your reflection in a smooth surface). Ask yourself, “How am I doing right now? How am I feeling? What’s happening in this moment?” By doing this you can begin to incorporate a sense of acceptance, compassion and curiosity for the experiences you’re having with the unexpected unknown.

2. Ensure Your Safety

Make sure you are safe–physically, mentally and/or emotionally.

When unexpected events become dangerous, your safety and the safety of others are the top priorities. Do what you can with what you have to remove yourself from the danger.

Decision-making in uncertain situations can be stressful and challenging. Consider your options, prioritize your needs and trust your intuition. That being said, safety first.

3. Focus on What You Can Control:

Recognize that some aspects of the unknown will always be beyond your control. Concentrate your efforts and energy on the things you can influence, and let go of the rest for now.

4. Gather Information:

Fear of the unknown often stems from a lack of understanding regarding your current situation. Take the initiative to gather information about the situation or challenge you’re facing. Knowledge can be a powerful tool in demystifying the unknown.

Ask questions. Demand answers. Build a paper trail. Stay curious and open to new ideas. A spirit of resourcefulness can help reduce anxieties when navigating uncertain terrain.

That being said, don’t overload and drown yourself in data either. Consider cutting back on certain streams of information lacking usefulness to your current circumstances (such as social media and political news sources). This might be a prime time for a digital detox.

5. Seek Support and Connection:

Don’t face the unknown alone. Share your fears and concerns with trusted friends and family members. Talking about your feelings can provide emotional support and offer different perspectives.

If you’ve moved to a new location, put yourself in situations where you can begin to make new social connections.

Also, don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for professional help if needed. If fear of uncertainty is overwhelming and affecting your daily life, consider seeking help from a therapist or counselor. They can provide specialized tools and strategies to manage your anxiety.

6. Be Gentle With Yourself:

Show yourself kindness. You’re in a phase of uncertainty. You won’t have all the answers right away. That’s okay. Be gentle with yourself. As you begin to understand more about the situation, you’ll be able to do more about the situation. You’ve got this.

Despite Fears of the Unknown, You’ll Get Through This:

Fear of the unknown is a common human experience, but it doesn’t have to paralyze us. By acknowledging our feelings, staying present, seeking information, and embracing uncertainty, we can navigate the unknown with greater confidence and resilience.

Remember that the path to personal growth often involves stepping into the unknown, and it’s where some of life’s most remarkable experiences and achievements can be found.

Next Phase?

Depending on personal coping skills and/or the traumatic nature of one’s circumstances, the next phase will vary.

For those experiencing emotional numbness or “zombie brain,” Phase 2 (SAFETY ZONE) is the next step.

If you’ve gotten through the initial shock of an unexpected unknown, but continue to struggle emotionally, go to Phase 3 (BREATHE).

Already feeling mindful and balanced? Continue on to Phase 4 (INVENTORY).